Archive for Apple

The key to a successful business is a sociopathic streak

Posted in I Ramble You Decide with tags , , , , , , , , on May 21, 2012 by mickgirk

It’s with great resignation that I have determined that I can never make millions of dollars in the world of business. It’s a disappointing self-discovery.

Well, not that disappointing. As it turns out, in order to run a mega-zillion dollar company, you probably have to be what the practice of psychology calls a “sociopath.” This is probably not news to anyone, but thanks to the internet, more proof of this assertion is available than ever before.

Let us start “small”. This is an article I read a few days ago, detailing the business practice of online scams.

On a semi-related tangent, this is the text of an email I used to get from a “Fred Duff,” offering me an interview for a position in “professional corporate sales” with one Lionheart Assurance Solutions despite the fact that I have absolutely NO experience in sales whatsoever (brackets added to prevent stalkage of me):

Dear [McGirk],

We have reviewed your resume on and may have an interest in scheduling you for an interview. Please take a moment to answer a brief questionnaire (at the link below) that will further assist us in determining if a preliminary match exists between your qualification profile and our goals for this position.

Although this position does not require a daily commute to our offices, initial interviews will be conducted at our [fill in city here] Regional Office on Tuesday, May 10th, 2011. There is no guarantee that you will be selected for an interview. If you are selected for an initial interview and are then invited to continue on in our selection process, subsequent interviews (after the first interview) will primarily be conducted by telephone.

PLEASE NOTE:  We are contacting you because our review of your resume indicates a potential fit for professional corporate sales. If you feel we have contacted you in error, there is no reason for you to complete the compatibility profile below. Please simply scroll to the bottom of this email and click the opt-out link to be permanently removed from further consideration.

Visit the secure link below for our online compatibility questionnaire:

Who We Are Looking For

Qualified candidates must possess excellent interpersonal communications skills, and a level of professionalism suitable for dealing with senior level executives and business owners. Public speaking skills appropriate for presenting to groups of 10 to 40 employees at a time are a plus.

Ideal candidates have an uncommon combination of attributes. They are self-motivated, entrepreneurial individuals who are ready to leave behind the constraints of the traditional corporate job model and build a secure future of their own for themselves and their families. At the same time, they are highly coachable team players who are willing to follow a proven training and support system designed to help them achieve their goals.

Lionheart Agents comprise an elite national team of highly trained corporate sales executives with the opportunity to earn a substantial short-term income while building a fully vested, long-term residual income marketing our unique plans as employee benefits and as valuable tools for business owners.

About Us

With offices around the country, Lionheart Assurance Solutions, LP specializes in providing employers of all sizes with cutting edge employee benefits specifically designed for identity theft restoration and access to the legal system.

Our mission is to help employers by addressing two timely needs in the marketplace; identity theft and affordable access to legal counsel. Identity theft has become the fastest growing crime in the US, with over 27,000 new victims daily. reports that over 255 million Americans have reported their identities lost or stolen since January, 2005. The vast majority of identity theft issues end up in legal problems.

Roughly 80 percent of the public is locked out of the legal system due to cost. According to the National Resource Center for Consumers of Legal Services, “Even law abiding Americans will encounter a potential legal situation an average of four to six times per year.” Employees who have problems off the job, bring those problems with them on the job. This costs the employer in lost productivity, which impacts their bottom line. The unique employee benefit plans we provide enhance worker productivity by helping employees keep their focus on their work instead of on personal problems.

For small to medium-sized clients, we also offer a full range of plans that help small businesses to “level the playing field” by providing access to the kinds of legal and consultative advice that typically only a large corporation can afford.

All additional details will be discussed at the interview, if one is scheduled.

Thank you in advance,

Fred Duff, Area Vice President
Lionheart Assurance Solutions, LP
[Blah-blah-bloop-bloop] Regional Office

Lionheart Assurance Solutions, LP Corporate Office  |  1600 Lake Air Drive  |  Waco  |  TX  |  76710  |  (855) LIONHEART (546-6432)

What’s the point of sharing this? One, I think the above is amusing. Two, this is low-level sociopathy, as in the defect is strong in this one, even if the business acumen is low.

Let us continue:

Do you remember when the now-charitable Bill Gates spent the 90’s being evil?

No, not because of this.

Here’s a nice quote for you:

“Microsoft has had clear competitors in the past. It’s a good thing we have museums to document that.” Bill Gates, 2001

Here’s Wikipedia’s take on Microsoft’s legal troubles in the 90’s. Basically, the moral of the Microsoft story is, aggressively destroy your competition, and then cry innocence when lawsuits inevitably take place. Pay back your assholisism with massive doses of philanthropy later.

From here, the next logical step is mentioning Steve Jobs. But we all know that Steve Jobs was a ruthless bastard leading up to his untimely demise, so… yeah.

I’d rather bring up the most recent iteration of successful sociopaths, none other than Mark Zuckerberg.

The face of a business tyrant? Consider this, floating around the internet today.

OK, maybe he’s just an asshole, a young one in above article . But this is what convinced me of the accuracy of this post’s title, as Mr. Zuckerberg isn’t the nice affable genius portrayed by the media. No, Marky Mark displays a bit of a sociopathic streak, which manifests itself in the business practices of Facebook.

Hey, at least he’s not Stalin:

– McGirk